Monday, April 22, 2013

The waiting game

We left New Zealand with heavy hearts. Heavy because we were leaving friends and family behind but also heavy because we were leaving after losing our first baby. Things got a lot harder on us with two of my sister's announcing their pregnancies in close succession as we arrived in Perth - babies that would have been less than two months younger than our baby would have been. It took me a long time to be able to walk into a shop and buy them a baby gift, knowing that it would have been us needing the baby items had things been different.

We started trying again after waiting the recommended 2 months after a miscarriage and the waiting game commenced again. Nothing happened. We endured the endless questions from well meaning people "when are you going to have a baby?" responding with "We're trying!" My Mum made the joke that we should have shares in the pregnancy test business - the amount of tests we went through! It got to the point where I just didn't expect to see two little pink lines on the tests anymore.

At one year of trying after our miscarriage, we went to see the Doctor to see what was happening. He was so unhelpful and gave us our second lot of "oh you're so young, keep trying and come back in a year". Thanks. That helps.

December 2008 - we decided that we were going to really commit ourselves to praying about a baby and ... uh.... trying - A LOT. We prayed over my body that it would do what it needs to do and be able to maintain a pregnancy. We prayed over timing. We prayed over Nick's body. We prayed over the baby we were believing for - over each part of his or her body that it would be healthy and perfect. WE PRAYED!

I was due to begin my next cycle on the 23rd of December - just before Christmas. I prayed with everything in me that we would get a positive test that day. The 23rd came. Nick and I spent the day doing some last minute Christmas shopping and returned home that evening at about 8.30pm. I popped into the bathroom to do the test with such an expectant heart, inside cringing for the letdown that I had come to expect each testing time. Before the liquid had even finished covering the whole test result area we had two pink lines! I raced out of the bathroom and stopped frozen in the lounge room staring at Nick sitting on the couch.


We both were shocked and kept checking over and over again the test result. I raced back in and did another one (I bought a pack of 3) and sure enough - two pink lines!! Again they were like the tests I did with our first pregnancy - a lighter pink line and a darker one. I had done so much research by this time that I knew it didn't matter how dark the lines were - just that there were two! I couldn't believe it. A baby. Finally. A BABY!

We got to share with our family our news in a way that was so memorable and special to us. We asked to be put on speaker phone when we called Nick's family in New Zealand on Christmas Day. Everyone let out excitement and it was so fun to give them a Christmas present - the news of their first grandchild / niece / nephew / great-grandchild on the way.

With my family here in Perth we shared the news while opening presents. When everyone had done with opening the presents in my parents lounge just before a big Christmas lunch, I said to my Mum "oh! I forgot! I have a card that goes with your present". I feigned disinterest in watching her read it while talking with my sister across the room. I waited and waited holding Nick's hand until she got to the end of the card

"Dear Mum and Dad,
We just wanted to thank you for everything you have done for us since we moved to Perth. You've been such a great help and we appreciate it more than you know. We wanted to give you a present to say thanks but couldn't think of a better one than to give you another grandchild - due September.
Love Ali and Nick xx"

My Mum let out a squeal and looked up at me and said "Really??!!!" I started crying and said "YES!" and we jumped up and started hugging. Everyone else in the room started asking questions about what was going on and Dad read the card and pretty soon everyone understood what was happening. It was the most perfect way I could think of to announce our news to my family and I cherish the memories.

James was born 2 weeks early via C-Section due to some complications with Pre-eclampsia. We were in shock as we had been lead to believe we were having a girl at our 20 week scan! We were overjoyed with our surprise little boy and quickly worked to replace the pink with blue. He has been such a joy for us and we love him to bits! He is now a happy, healthy, bouncing, almost 4 year old boy who makes us laugh daily. He was well worth the wait!

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